Obstacles

Coming off my trip, I knew this post was going to be a critical one.  Why?  This is the first post I've written since I re-entered the real world (AKA returned to work).  I mentioned to one of my friends on Sunday night that I was really nervous about this week, because I was afraid of what work would do to my resolve and all the positive gains I had made during my trip.  Work is going to be the single biggest obstacle to me becoming the person I want to be after this trip.

Now let's be honest - most days I really do love my job.  I work with some absolutely incredible people who teach me and challenge me everyday.  I love my co-workers and wouldn't trade them for the world.  However, this job, especially at this particular client, can be extremely taxing. Every demand is a fire drill and we operate in an environment that is constantly changing and uncertain.  Take those factors and combine them with the long hours and trying to live up to my recent promotion and you have the recipe for high-stress.  Stress leads to bad habits and bad decisions.  Stress can totally throw this whole thing out of whack.

The week started off innocently enough, but as the week progressed, things really got busy and hectic.  When 5:00PM rolled aroundtonight, I was ready for a drink…a really stiff one.  Compare this week to last week, and you have a 180 degree difference, and not in a good way.  There will be many more weeks like this to come and I owe it to myself to ensure I don't lose everything I gained during my trip.  So as I sit here (still at work), I ask myself one question - now that it's over, how do I feel?

Surprisingly, pretty damn good.  I got beat down today (I get at least one of these every week), but I'm still smiling and really looking forward to the weekend.  The texts from my friends have helped.  As I think about the weekend and escaping this mad reality for a little while, the stress seems to be melting away almost instantly.  One of my team members (probably the guy who is most honest and most critical of me) told me he's hopeful I can make the leap, but he's skeptical.  I don't blame him.  Sometimes, I doubt myself.  The difference between today and prior to the trip is that I would take the stress home with me.  I don't feel the need to do that anymore.  Work is work and I need to make sure it doesn't take over my life.  I'm determined not to let it.  It's only week 1, but they say it only takes 21 days to develop a habit - both good and bad.  So the way I see it, I'm 2 weeks away from being much better at managing my stress level and my priorities.

More to come later this weekend.  Shabbat Shalom everyone.

Kaps

Song of the Day: Radiohead - Everything in its Right Place